What Are the Duties of a Groomsmen?

groom suit

So, your good friends bestowed upon you the honor of being a groomsmen at their wedding, and you’re wondering what exactly your duties are?

Well, besides looking like a million bucks, handsome in pictures with the bride and groom, and dancing with any single girls, you do have a multitude of other obligations.

Pre-wedding

If you are the best man, you will be expected to plan the groom’s bachelor party. If you are one of the groomsmen, you may be expected to help in its planning, too. You will also be expected to help cover the cost of the party for the groom. Either way, your buddy is getting married so be sure to give him a party he will remember and look back on fondly for the rest of his life. Where you go and what things you do will be entirely up to the groom, his personality, and his interests.

Though the chances are low, you may also be asked to help handpick guests, offer suggestions for the wedding festivities, and plan any other wedding-related activities.

This is the good part, where you get to dress up and look sharp in a tuxedo. The groom will usually pick out the design and style he wants for the wedding. All you need to do is get to the fitting and give the rental place enough time to get your tuxedo together. In the past, the bride and groom used to cover the cost of the rental. These days, you will be covering the cost of the rental, transportation, and lodging yourself. Of course, be sure to show up for the final fitting early enough so as to give the rental place ample time to make any last minute alterations.

Preparations

As part of the wedding party, you will need to show up at the wedding location and help prepare the locale. For example, if the wedding is to take place in a yard you will need to help with the yard work, furniture setup, and decorations. Likewise, if the wedding is to take place in a hotel then you may need to help with decorations. The bride and groom will usually let you know what needs to be done. Of course, be proactive and ask what help they need.

Wedding Rehearsal

It goes without saying that you will need to attend the rehearsal. Here, you find out what you need to do on the day of the wedding, with whom you will escort down the aisle and back up, where to stand, and so on and so forth. If you are the best man, you may be asked to be the ring bearer.

The dinner rehearsal typically takes place the same night and guests typically consists of the bride and groom’s families and the wedding party. This is mixer party that gives everyone a chance to get to know each other.

Day of the Wedding

So, the big day is finally here, arriving seemingly in the blink of an eye. Your job as a best man is to soothe any pre-wedding jitters and make sure the groom gets to the wedding. Typically, the groom, his groomsmen, and his buddies will get together and have drinks. When the wedding hour draws close, everyone will be helping everyone else get dressed. Sometimes, suspenders and bow ties could be difficult to properly attire, so it helps to have a buddy close by to give you a hand.

With everyone looking sharp, make sure you get the groom where he needs to be at the allotted time. Sometimes, photographs are taken before the wedding so as to minimize the time guests have to wait. What happens depends entirely on what the bride and groom wishes to do.

Now, go grab a drink, relax, and have a good time!

Bringing It All Together

To review, the duties of a groomsmen are quite straightforward.

  • Help plan and attend the bachelor party. Help pay for the cost of this party.
  • Though the chances are low, you may also be asked for your opinion on helping to select guests and plan the wedding festivities, as well as any other wedding-related activities.
  • Get fitted, pick up and return your tuxedo.
  • Help with any setup duties prior to the wedding, such as yard clean-up, moving furniture, putting up decorations, etc.
  • Attend the wedding rehearsal.
  • Attend the dinner rehearsal.
  • Support the groom on the day of wedding for any pre-wedding jitters he may be experiencing.
  • Attend the wedding (duh!).
  • Optional: Escort guests to their seating area. Which side they are seated depends on the relationship of the guest to the couple. Traditional, the friends and family of the bride is on the left, and friends and family of the groom is on the right. If you are at a Jewish wedding, it is reversed. Offer your arm to any ladies. If she is with a male companion, he will adhere to the rules of social etiquette and follow closely behind the two of you. If a group of women show up together, seat the oldest woman first (age before beauty).
  • Make small talk with guests. Help break the ice.
  • Pose for pictures with the groom and bride.
  • Give a speech and make a toast to the happy couple, if you happen to be the best man or are asked.
  • Dance with any single girls.
  • Help with tear-down, post-wedding.

Your friends asked you to be a groomsmen for a very good reason; namely, because you are a significant part of their lives. They wish to share with you their happy day and be part of a very special moment in their lives. Take your obligations and duties as a groomsmen seriously. They are counting on you!

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